By: Anuradha
A relationship is not just unison of two bodies but also two different souls with different qualities and characteristics. When a relationship consists of one highly empathetic person and one person who lack empathy, their union is toxic to the core.
Empaths and narcissists have so many different qualities and they are actually polar opposites. They have so many differences and even though some people believe that opposites attract each other, the truth is that when two people are too much different from each other in every aspect, it is very hard for them to have a healthy relationship.
Writing to Business Insider, Lindsay Dodgson says that “Empaths are ‘emotional sponges’ who can absorb feelings from other people very easily. This makes them very attractive to the narcissist because they see someone who will fulfill their every need in a selfless way”.
Narcissists are the people who are emotionally wounded and they always live with pain. They try to reduce their suffering by inflicting their pain over the ones around them and they do this by using various tactics. When an empath stick with a narcissist, they will immediately try to heal the narcissist as they are natural healers. Empaths do not like to see people suffer and this is what makes their relationship a toxic one.
Empaths will see the real reason behind the mask the narcissist wears and this is why they continue to forgive them.
However, we all should keep in our mind that we can’t change any person just because we want them to be changed or they have the potential to be changed. Everyone is different from one another in various levels and narcissists do not really like to change themselves.
The author of the Psychology Today, Deborah Ward says that “Narcissists create relationships with [empaths] that essentially allow them to feed off the kindness of the empath, to satisfy their insatiable appetite for praise, attention, and admiration, power and material things until the [empath] is left emotionally drained, exhausted and powerless”.
Which is why so many empaths feel it is hard to leave the relationship, even if it is toxic.
Speaking to the Business Insider, Dr. Judith Orloff tells that “What narcissists see in empaths is a giving, loving person who is going to try and be devoted to you and love you and listen to you. But unfortunately, empaths are attracted to narcissists, because at first, this is about a false self. Narcissists present a false self, where they can seem charming and intelligent, and even giving until you don’t do things their way, and then they get cold, withholding and punishing”.
Everything that narcissists do is for their own benefit but empaths do not understand this. They think that they can fix things and that is the place where the problem is created.
Empaths are genuine and kind people, so they expect others to be the same.
When an empath has their first encounter with a narcissist, it will open their eyes to a world that they didn’t know earlier.
This new world will be tiresome but empaths can tolerate a lot of things as long as they have time to recharge themselves.
However, there can never be a healthy relationship among a narcissist and an empath as there is no balance between ‘give and take’.
So, when it is the high time to leave, all the empaths must keep in their mind that they are a lot more strong than they think themselves to be and therefore, always believe in you!